…..wherever you are, whoever you may be, I hope we find each other ❤
I want you to be a fuck yes. To laugh with me, laugh at me, make me laugh and enjoy my laughter.
I want you to have a beautiful smile, with eyes that light up. I want you to have a warm embracing hug; and a soft, delicate touch but also to grab me cheekily when appropriate. I want you to be as cheeky as I am and to understand my cheekiness. I want you to enjoy similar music – and enjoy a sexy playlist to groove to for sexy times.
I want to feel naturally compelled to compliment you – how you are, the way you dress, your natural scent, how attractive you are to me, your kind nature and amazing mind. I want you to be beautiful and sexy and handsome and cute.
I want you to enjoy the different sides of me – various ways I like to dress. I want you to enjoy me dressing up – as much for me as it is for you. I want you to compliment me more than your friends or family; and more than my friends or family. I want to see it in your eyes and on your face – you checking me out, devouring me with your eyes. I want others to notice how you look at me. I want you to call me sexy and cute and beautiful and hot. I want you to think that I am a spunk – whatever your version of that is.
I want you to see my smarts and caring nature and kindness too. I want you to adore my body and my crazy mind. I want you to reply to others when they comment on you being lucky to have me in your life. And I want to be able to reply how lucky I am too.
I want you to want to explore the world with me – adventures both near and far. I want you to explore my world, study it, learn about where I came from and what makes me me. I want you to know me. I want you to care to call me out on my bullshit. To make me question whether I am holding true to my values. I want to know your world, what it’s made of, what you value, what makes you excited like a kid at Christmas. I want to know what you wanted to be when you were little. I want to know what gets you out of bed or keeps you awake until way past your bed time.
I want you to know how to care and nurture – to be able to, and want to, take care of me when I am unwell. I want you to be thoughtful – to think of and notice the little details. Things that I like and enjoy. Things that get my attention.
I want you to ask me if I’ve eaten – do I need dinner or lunch or coffee? I want you to care about health and wellness – about eating well and good. I want you to care about what may or may not be in your food. I want you to understand how food affects how you feel and perform and affects your health. But back on thoughtfulness, I want you to be uber thoughtful – to want to offer that level of support to me; to think of things that will help me, make me smile. To set up a disco in the lounge when I want to go out dancing but can’t. I want you to know that I would 100% love something hand made and thoughtful – just for me – over anything you can buy in a store any day of the week.
I want you to spoil me with affection and attention. I want you to enjoy affection as much as I do. I want you to enjoy play world or be open to exploring play world with me. I want to be able to talk about intimate matters and sex with you comfortably and openly. I want you to love to talk about anything and everything with me – all the weird, whacky and wonderful. I want you to prefer talking with me or learning new things or reading over watching mindless TV, although happily indulging in the odd mindless TV binge on occasion. I want you to be interested in personalities, people, how people communicate and what makes them tick. I want you to be interested in or understanding and accepting of “woo woo”.
I want you to share my love of Latino music and interest in learning Latin dance. Or any style of dance. I want you to understand my love of fitness and weight training and the struggle to stay consistent. I’d love for you to enjoy weight training or some sort of fitness pursuit.
I want you to have a good level of emotional intelligence and to strive to be better at EQ, alongside me. I want you to be interested in personal development, mindset and growth. I want you to be curious and kind. I want you to be aware of hunting your demons and darkness, despite how scary that can be. I want you to understand that the only way out is through. The light is only at the end of the tunnel – you must get through it to find the light.
I want you to tell me what you want, without expectation. I want to be able to tell you what I want – even the stuff you struggle to understand. I want you to want to understand. And I want to understand your wants and desires too. I want to remember that you can’t read my mind, but you yearn to understand me as much as I yearn to understand you.
I want you to enjoy lying out under the stars with me. Gazing at the night sky and infinite possibilities. I want you to enjoy savouring the beauty of nature with me, finding beauty and gratitude in every day.
I want you to be grateful for finding me and I want to be grateful for finding you.
Browsing past blogs for some writing inspiration and decided to read this post…. WOW.
So needing to see these words right now.
Following on from my previous post, this letter is from my future self…..setting intentions with the new moon.
**I originally wrote this letter to Magenta, but realised that Magenta will not exist in my future. Magenta is only a stepping stone on the path to creating Me.
Write a repair letter, a love letter, or a gratitude letter to a past/present/future version of you, to others who have shaped and deeply impacted your life, or to those you have unfinished business with. You know the letter I speak of—it is the one you carry in your heart, that writes itself in those “in-between” moments, the one that you would write if only you were brave and honest enough. – via Elephant Journal
Dear 2017 Me – the caterpillar,
I know that you have been working a lot on yourself over the last few years, which has definitely reached a peak at…
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Here I sit: day in, day out
Fighting my fears and my doubts
Drowning in stuck and hate
Feeling lighter and heavier day by day
Letting go but being weighed down
Always smiling, but fighting the frown
Needing to remember my own lessons – patience, presence, practicing self love
Where do you look when you don’t know what you’re looking for? When you aren’t afraid of the dark but the dark seems to suffocate you?
Words could be written but I’d prefer to close this chapter with music & lyrics.
A conversation with a workmate who has been observing my ‘resting sad face’ or ‘resting sad eyes’ recently as he passes my desk. A special friend to have at work who knows of my Magenta tales and I enjoy having a giggle with.
Workmate: I was going to say – you have the resting facial expression of someone who knows they’ll be tying up a stripper within the next 48 hours.
Magenta: Bahahahaha. You just wanted to say that.
Workmate: No, legit. You had this monalisaesque smug knowing look on your face.
…..stay tuned for the minxy tale to come 😈
So it is Easter. A quarter through the year.
Over six months separated from Husband.
Two months since news from TheMaster rendered me devastated and confused.
A few bouts of illness on my part. As well as dealing with other personal family matters.
Many minxy adventures scattered in between.
The continuing effects of all of these things have made me beyond exhausted. I haven’t been sleeping well and despite getting back on track at the start of the year, I haven’t been eating well.
And I have been doing too much in general.
So I have decided to have a break. I quit my job. And in the very near future I will be leaving on a jet plane. To park my butt on the beach, sand between my toes without a care in the world.
I’m not sure how much I’ll be around to get updates finished prior to then but I will be most definitely catching up on things once I take pause.
And I cannot wait!